Effort underway to educate, empower parents in aiding troubled teens
July 29, 2019 at 12:37 p.m.
Faced with numerous societal pressures, teenagers today carry heavy burdens that can often lead to serious depression. And according to Divine Word Missionaries Father Martin Padovani, parents armed with the knowledge and communication skills can be the most important people in helping their teens overcome emotional distress.
In the wake of a string of teen deaths – many suspected suicides – in the Spring Lake and Manasquan area, Father Padovani has joined in a groundswell effort to bring about healing for those affected by the tragedies and to work toward preventing further deaths. That effort will include a presentation entitled “Key Faith Reflections for Parents of Teenagers” in St. Catharine School, 301 Second Ave., Spring Lake, March 24 at 7:30 p.m.
Father Padovani, who resides with the Divine Word Missionaries in Bordentown and is a frequent weekend Mass celebrant in St. Catharine Church, a worship site of St. Catharine-St. Margaret Parish, said that his talk is a first step in an initiative to raise awareness of teen issues and prevent future tragedies.
Father Padovani is also involved in the planning stages of the Samaritan Center, an ecumenical project being put together by the First Presbyterian Church of Manasquan and several local partners in the community to help people cope with their losses and to begin looking at the underlying issues involved.
“This is really the beginning of something that is going to bring help and healing and hope to the area,” said Father Padovani, a trained psychologist with more than 40 years of counseling experience. “We’ve got to shake parents up and make them realize that they are the most important people (in their children’s lives).
“And we’ve got to realize that these kids today are under siege,” he added. “The atmosphere out there is very toxic and very hostile, so we have got to get on the stick and try to really start doing something here.”
The deaths in the Spring Lake area, which are similar to many other tragedies that have taken place in communities nationwide, are often termed “cluster suicides.” In such cases one teen’s death can lead to others repeating the act, setting off a chain reaction.
But while some are hesitant to discuss the suicides for fear that it will only lead to more tragedy, Father Padovani feels that it is important to address the issue head on.
When invited to serve as the homilist for the funeral Mass of one of the suicide victims in Spring Lake, he said that many in attendance were appreciative of his direct approach to the difficult subject.
“I pretty much laid this stuff on the table and I used the word ‘suicide’ and I used some tough language,” Father Padovani explained. He related positive feedback he received after the funeral, adding that some people said, “You finally called it what it is.”
He stressed, however, that it is important to take a positive approach by not putting all of the emphasis on suicide but rather addressing the serious issues that have caused it and how to overcome them.
“If you talk about suicides, at the same time you’ve got to say they are symptomatic of underlying problems that we have to address,” Father Padovani said.
“We want to say that the suicides happened, but what can we do now? What are the underlying causes? How are we going to reach out to troubled children?”
He added that the talk, as well as the work of the Samaritan Center, will educate parents about depression and will aim to remove some of the negative stigma attached to it.
“Depression is an illness that is all over the place and it has to be treated,” he said. “We’ve got treatment, counseling and medication that can do wonders. We’ve got to recognize the enemy and we’ve got to be able to deal with it.”
He added that such information is especially critical for parents of younger children, “because in a lot of ways, if you are starting to get interested in your child when they are a teenager, you are already too late.”
“Really parents need help way back in the early days of rearing their children in being able to handle a lot of these issues,” Father Padovani said.
Dory Pettit, a member of the parish council of St. Catharine-St. Margaret, said that the talk will be beneficial for both parents and teenagers in the community and that it will “help teenagers hold on to their spiritual strength during critical times.”
“I think it is a great opportunity for our parish to have Father Padovani come and speak,” she said. “All parents and teenagers should really take advantage of it because he is so well-versed on these issues.”
The event is free and open to the public and will include a question and answer session with Father Padovani. For those who are unable to attend, the presentation will be recorded and available by contacting the parish office at (732) 449-5765 ex. 100.
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Faced with numerous societal pressures, teenagers today carry heavy burdens that can often lead to serious depression. And according to Divine Word Missionaries Father Martin Padovani, parents armed with the knowledge and communication skills can be the most important people in helping their teens overcome emotional distress.
In the wake of a string of teen deaths – many suspected suicides – in the Spring Lake and Manasquan area, Father Padovani has joined in a groundswell effort to bring about healing for those affected by the tragedies and to work toward preventing further deaths. That effort will include a presentation entitled “Key Faith Reflections for Parents of Teenagers” in St. Catharine School, 301 Second Ave., Spring Lake, March 24 at 7:30 p.m.
Father Padovani, who resides with the Divine Word Missionaries in Bordentown and is a frequent weekend Mass celebrant in St. Catharine Church, a worship site of St. Catharine-St. Margaret Parish, said that his talk is a first step in an initiative to raise awareness of teen issues and prevent future tragedies.
Father Padovani is also involved in the planning stages of the Samaritan Center, an ecumenical project being put together by the First Presbyterian Church of Manasquan and several local partners in the community to help people cope with their losses and to begin looking at the underlying issues involved.
“This is really the beginning of something that is going to bring help and healing and hope to the area,” said Father Padovani, a trained psychologist with more than 40 years of counseling experience. “We’ve got to shake parents up and make them realize that they are the most important people (in their children’s lives).
“And we’ve got to realize that these kids today are under siege,” he added. “The atmosphere out there is very toxic and very hostile, so we have got to get on the stick and try to really start doing something here.”
The deaths in the Spring Lake area, which are similar to many other tragedies that have taken place in communities nationwide, are often termed “cluster suicides.” In such cases one teen’s death can lead to others repeating the act, setting off a chain reaction.
But while some are hesitant to discuss the suicides for fear that it will only lead to more tragedy, Father Padovani feels that it is important to address the issue head on.
When invited to serve as the homilist for the funeral Mass of one of the suicide victims in Spring Lake, he said that many in attendance were appreciative of his direct approach to the difficult subject.
“I pretty much laid this stuff on the table and I used the word ‘suicide’ and I used some tough language,” Father Padovani explained. He related positive feedback he received after the funeral, adding that some people said, “You finally called it what it is.”
He stressed, however, that it is important to take a positive approach by not putting all of the emphasis on suicide but rather addressing the serious issues that have caused it and how to overcome them.
“If you talk about suicides, at the same time you’ve got to say they are symptomatic of underlying problems that we have to address,” Father Padovani said.
“We want to say that the suicides happened, but what can we do now? What are the underlying causes? How are we going to reach out to troubled children?”
He added that the talk, as well as the work of the Samaritan Center, will educate parents about depression and will aim to remove some of the negative stigma attached to it.
“Depression is an illness that is all over the place and it has to be treated,” he said. “We’ve got treatment, counseling and medication that can do wonders. We’ve got to recognize the enemy and we’ve got to be able to deal with it.”
He added that such information is especially critical for parents of younger children, “because in a lot of ways, if you are starting to get interested in your child when they are a teenager, you are already too late.”
“Really parents need help way back in the early days of rearing their children in being able to handle a lot of these issues,” Father Padovani said.
Dory Pettit, a member of the parish council of St. Catharine-St. Margaret, said that the talk will be beneficial for both parents and teenagers in the community and that it will “help teenagers hold on to their spiritual strength during critical times.”
“I think it is a great opportunity for our parish to have Father Padovani come and speak,” she said. “All parents and teenagers should really take advantage of it because he is so well-versed on these issues.”
The event is free and open to the public and will include a question and answer session with Father Padovani. For those who are unable to attend, the presentation will be recorded and available by contacting the parish office at (732) 449-5765 ex. 100.