‘Hope in Eternal Life’: Diocese’s infant burial ministry offers loving response to grieving families
January 20, 2025 at 7:00 a.m.
Desiring to support parents during one of the most difficult times of their lives – the loss of a baby – the Catholic Cemeteries of the Diocese of Trenton has responded in a loving and spiritual ministry.
“The loss of a child at any stage brings profound grief, but our hope is that through this ministry, families find a sense of peace,” said Deacon David O’Connor, executive director of Catholic Cemeteries for the Diocese, and deacon in St. Theresa Parish, Little Egg Harbor.
At Jesus Bread of Life Cemetery in Mount Laurel, “we honor the sanctity of every life, no matter how brief,” he said. Infant burials offer “a sacred resting place for children who have passed away, whether during pregnancy or shortly after birth.”
Families who choose diocesan cemeteries may be given the option of traditional burial or, in some cases, cremation, depending on the circumstances and preferences.
“Regardless of the choice, we ensure that each child is laid to rest with compassion and reverence. Every burial is accompanied by a Mass or prayer service, offering families an opportunity to pray, grieve and receive comfort through the Church’s intercession.”
Recognizing a Need
According to Deacon O’Connor, the ministry is rooted in the Corporal Works of Mercy, particularly the work of caring for the deceased. Their mission – “A Ministry of Hope in Eternal Life” – is the cornerstone for all diocesan cemeteries and embraces the Catholic faith.
“As we prayed for the souls of the departed, we became increasingly aware of the unique and heartbreaking needs of families who had lost a child, especially during pregnancy,” he explained.
Deacon David O’Connor presides at an infant burial at Jesus Bread of Life Cemetery with Givnish Funeral Home.
Partnering with nearby Virtua Health System and Bradley Funeral Homes, the Department of Cemeteries found a way to provide a sacred resting place for infants, which included setting aside 11 crypts in Jesus Bread of Life’s newly constructed mausoleum.When the Bradley Funeral Home told Ann Coyle, a Catholic nurse working at Virtua Health, of the Diocese’s infant burial ministry, she went to work forging connections with Jesus Bread of Life Cemetery, in hopes that families in her hospital could take advantage of the opportunity. She founded and has managed the perinatal bereavement program at Virtua Health since 2015.
“While the ministry’s focus is on infants who are stillborn or who die in utero at this healthcare system, we also extend our services, in collaboration with our funeral industry partners, to families who have lost a child up to the age of one,” Deacon O’Connor explained. “Our goal is to provide spiritual and emotional support for all who are grieving the loss of a child, regardless of the specific circumstances.”
Solace for Families
The diocesan Department of Cemeteries has a relationship with all the funeral homes in the area, who can direct families to the infant burial ministry.
“Our Bishop blessed this initiative, recognizing that these children, though not physically known to us, are known to God … and thus we honor their brief but precious lives with prayer,” he continued, pointing to the Scripture passage, “Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you” (Jer 1:5).
Bishop David M. O’Connell, C.M., “has really embraced this ministry,” Deacon O’Connor said. “Through his goodness, we have the ability to offer them a grave … and to pray for all the souls who have no one to pray for them.”
As part of his ministry at Jesus Bread of Life Cemetery, Deacon O’Connor provides a committal service that is specific to children, including a Song of Farewell to the infants.
“It has turned into something very emotionally powerful, moving and rich in God’s grace,” he said. “It’s part of a spiritual work of mercy … of consoling and bereavement.”
The cost for infant burial is fully covered by the Diocese of Trenton, generous partners in the funeral industry and the Virtua Health System.
The top row of crypts at Jesus Bread of Life Cemetery and Mausoleum is reserved for Virtua Health System babies. Courtesy photos
“Our aim is to offer a resource without adding any financial burden,” he continued, noting that he makes himself available to the families for bereavement counseling also. “I tell them it never gets easier … but we want them to come back and pray.”
The feedback from families has been overwhelmingly positive, Deacon O’Connor said.
“Many have expressed deep gratitude for the compassion, dignity and spiritual solace” they experienced. As of today, over 100 infants have been laid to rest through this ministry. Each child is remembered … and their families are continually prayed for as part of the Church’s mission.”
The ministry is successful not because of the numbers of families served, he emphasized, “but by the spiritual hope and healing we can offer to those in grief. The beauty of this ministry lies in the love and mercy we extend.”
Related Stories
Diocesan cemetery pre-planning open house Feb. 8
Saturday, February 22, 2025
E-Editions
Events
Desiring to support parents during one of the most difficult times of their lives – the loss of a baby – the Catholic Cemeteries of the Diocese of Trenton has responded in a loving and spiritual ministry.
“The loss of a child at any stage brings profound grief, but our hope is that through this ministry, families find a sense of peace,” said Deacon David O’Connor, executive director of Catholic Cemeteries for the Diocese, and deacon in St. Theresa Parish, Little Egg Harbor.
At Jesus Bread of Life Cemetery in Mount Laurel, “we honor the sanctity of every life, no matter how brief,” he said. Infant burials offer “a sacred resting place for children who have passed away, whether during pregnancy or shortly after birth.”
Families who choose diocesan cemeteries may be given the option of traditional burial or, in some cases, cremation, depending on the circumstances and preferences.
“Regardless of the choice, we ensure that each child is laid to rest with compassion and reverence. Every burial is accompanied by a Mass or prayer service, offering families an opportunity to pray, grieve and receive comfort through the Church’s intercession.”
Recognizing a Need
According to Deacon O’Connor, the ministry is rooted in the Corporal Works of Mercy, particularly the work of caring for the deceased. Their mission – “A Ministry of Hope in Eternal Life” – is the cornerstone for all diocesan cemeteries and embraces the Catholic faith.
“As we prayed for the souls of the departed, we became increasingly aware of the unique and heartbreaking needs of families who had lost a child, especially during pregnancy,” he explained.
Deacon David O’Connor presides at an infant burial at Jesus Bread of Life Cemetery with Givnish Funeral Home.
Partnering with nearby Virtua Health System and Bradley Funeral Homes, the Department of Cemeteries found a way to provide a sacred resting place for infants, which included setting aside 11 crypts in Jesus Bread of Life’s newly constructed mausoleum.When the Bradley Funeral Home told Ann Coyle, a Catholic nurse working at Virtua Health, of the Diocese’s infant burial ministry, she went to work forging connections with Jesus Bread of Life Cemetery, in hopes that families in her hospital could take advantage of the opportunity. She founded and has managed the perinatal bereavement program at Virtua Health since 2015.
“While the ministry’s focus is on infants who are stillborn or who die in utero at this healthcare system, we also extend our services, in collaboration with our funeral industry partners, to families who have lost a child up to the age of one,” Deacon O’Connor explained. “Our goal is to provide spiritual and emotional support for all who are grieving the loss of a child, regardless of the specific circumstances.”
Solace for Families
The diocesan Department of Cemeteries has a relationship with all the funeral homes in the area, who can direct families to the infant burial ministry.
“Our Bishop blessed this initiative, recognizing that these children, though not physically known to us, are known to God … and thus we honor their brief but precious lives with prayer,” he continued, pointing to the Scripture passage, “Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you” (Jer 1:5).
Bishop David M. O’Connell, C.M., “has really embraced this ministry,” Deacon O’Connor said. “Through his goodness, we have the ability to offer them a grave … and to pray for all the souls who have no one to pray for them.”
As part of his ministry at Jesus Bread of Life Cemetery, Deacon O’Connor provides a committal service that is specific to children, including a Song of Farewell to the infants.
“It has turned into something very emotionally powerful, moving and rich in God’s grace,” he said. “It’s part of a spiritual work of mercy … of consoling and bereavement.”
The cost for infant burial is fully covered by the Diocese of Trenton, generous partners in the funeral industry and the Virtua Health System.
The top row of crypts at Jesus Bread of Life Cemetery and Mausoleum is reserved for Virtua Health System babies. Courtesy photos
“Our aim is to offer a resource without adding any financial burden,” he continued, noting that he makes himself available to the families for bereavement counseling also. “I tell them it never gets easier … but we want them to come back and pray.”
The feedback from families has been overwhelmingly positive, Deacon O’Connor said.
“Many have expressed deep gratitude for the compassion, dignity and spiritual solace” they experienced. As of today, over 100 infants have been laid to rest through this ministry. Each child is remembered … and their families are continually prayed for as part of the Church’s mission.”
The ministry is successful not because of the numbers of families served, he emphasized, “but by the spiritual hope and healing we can offer to those in grief. The beauty of this ministry lies in the love and mercy we extend.”