Family, Church keys to helping kids ride out today’s stressors
November 26, 2019 at 6:25 p.m.
We might not think twice about living in a fast-paced society where instant gratification is found simply by clicking onto a digital or social media site. But more often than not, the negatives of this culture far outweigh the positives, especially when it comes to increasing stress levels.
When it comes to grammar school-aged students, it’s been Lauren Breslin’s experience that “stress is even worse for kids because they are used to that.”
Students, said Breslin, a guidance counselor in St. Ann School, Lawrenceville, “don’t have to learn how to wait or how to talk to a person” because they do it digitally.
“In elementary school, students sometimes don’t realize they are stressed out,” she said. “They just come in with feelings – stomach aches and not wanting to go to school.”
Breslin’s observations were part of one of two recent programs held in the Diocese that focused on raising healthy and holy children in a digital world as well as giving parents the tools they need to help their children from a faith perspective.
Building Bridges
Breslin and Dr. Tim Hogan, a nationally recognized Family Life and Social-emotional learning expert for RCL Benziger’s Family Life Program, both view the anxiety and stress students are experiencing today through a similar lens. Hogan describes what’s affecting families today as a “cultural hurricane.” Breslin calls it “an alarming amount of overload.”
Today’s culture, Hogan said, is “radically different than the one we were in 20 years ago. We need to understand the way people think now. Empathy has been transformed by technology. We need to understand the roots of how that happened in order to be more effective. We need to help people build bridges.”
The family and the Church are the building blocks that meet those challenges, said Hogan, who addressed catechists, teachers and school administrators in the Diocesan Chancery, Lawrenceville, and St. Aloysius Parish, Jackson, during November.
“Family life is key to how we move people to a life of faith,” he said during his presentations, hosted by the diocesan Department of Catechesis. “But we have to realize that there’s a cultural hurricane every 500 or 600 years, and we are in one now. Five hundred years ago, we had to deal with the realization that earth wasn’t the center of the universe.”
“We started discovering all these changes that led to the birth of modernity, and now we are doing it again,” he continued. “They say we are in a post-Christian, post-marriage society. There’s chaos. There are hurricanes. There’s a change of the landscape.”
Observing that long-held traditions and customs revolving around Church and family – Sunday Mass and dinner, eating supper together as a family among them – no longer seem to apply, Hogan stated how the Second Vatican Council understood what was to come and provided the documents that would anchor the Church in troubled waters as the faithful strive to “hand down the faith in a relevant way.”
Mass Communication
Hogan and Breslin agreed that communicating predominantly through social media is not the best way to accomplish the goal of handing on the faith in a relevant way. In fact, if anything, it will likely lead to more stress and anxiety.
“You can read an email in five different ways, including angry and sarcastic, if you are not getting the cues, if there is no personal interaction,” said Breslin, whose presentation was offered on the school level during a recent meeting for St. Ann parents.
“The other thing with today’s social media,” she added, “is that no one is going to post things about their worst day. Celebrities are posting wonderful things, and kids see it as normal. They think things have to be perfect like it is for the celebrities. Everyone has issues, but you don’t see it on social media.”
Breslin noted that she advised parents that not all stress is bad for youngsters. “It the short term, it can be a good thing. Academically, it can motivate you to complete a project or prepare for a test.”
To address anxiety issues, Hogan recommended to “embrace the new norm.”
“Technology needs to get baptized; kids need to become organized, to learn self-awareness, self-management and social awareness. They need to learn relationship skills,” he said.
“Simple rules won’t work anymore. Begin the day with quiet, calming prayer. Bring [the youngsters] to Jesus. Start the day with gratitude … do things as a family.”
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We might not think twice about living in a fast-paced society where instant gratification is found simply by clicking onto a digital or social media site. But more often than not, the negatives of this culture far outweigh the positives, especially when it comes to increasing stress levels.
When it comes to grammar school-aged students, it’s been Lauren Breslin’s experience that “stress is even worse for kids because they are used to that.”
Students, said Breslin, a guidance counselor in St. Ann School, Lawrenceville, “don’t have to learn how to wait or how to talk to a person” because they do it digitally.
“In elementary school, students sometimes don’t realize they are stressed out,” she said. “They just come in with feelings – stomach aches and not wanting to go to school.”
Breslin’s observations were part of one of two recent programs held in the Diocese that focused on raising healthy and holy children in a digital world as well as giving parents the tools they need to help their children from a faith perspective.
Building Bridges
Breslin and Dr. Tim Hogan, a nationally recognized Family Life and Social-emotional learning expert for RCL Benziger’s Family Life Program, both view the anxiety and stress students are experiencing today through a similar lens. Hogan describes what’s affecting families today as a “cultural hurricane.” Breslin calls it “an alarming amount of overload.”
Today’s culture, Hogan said, is “radically different than the one we were in 20 years ago. We need to understand the way people think now. Empathy has been transformed by technology. We need to understand the roots of how that happened in order to be more effective. We need to help people build bridges.”
The family and the Church are the building blocks that meet those challenges, said Hogan, who addressed catechists, teachers and school administrators in the Diocesan Chancery, Lawrenceville, and St. Aloysius Parish, Jackson, during November.
“Family life is key to how we move people to a life of faith,” he said during his presentations, hosted by the diocesan Department of Catechesis. “But we have to realize that there’s a cultural hurricane every 500 or 600 years, and we are in one now. Five hundred years ago, we had to deal with the realization that earth wasn’t the center of the universe.”
“We started discovering all these changes that led to the birth of modernity, and now we are doing it again,” he continued. “They say we are in a post-Christian, post-marriage society. There’s chaos. There are hurricanes. There’s a change of the landscape.”
Observing that long-held traditions and customs revolving around Church and family – Sunday Mass and dinner, eating supper together as a family among them – no longer seem to apply, Hogan stated how the Second Vatican Council understood what was to come and provided the documents that would anchor the Church in troubled waters as the faithful strive to “hand down the faith in a relevant way.”
Mass Communication
Hogan and Breslin agreed that communicating predominantly through social media is not the best way to accomplish the goal of handing on the faith in a relevant way. In fact, if anything, it will likely lead to more stress and anxiety.
“You can read an email in five different ways, including angry and sarcastic, if you are not getting the cues, if there is no personal interaction,” said Breslin, whose presentation was offered on the school level during a recent meeting for St. Ann parents.
“The other thing with today’s social media,” she added, “is that no one is going to post things about their worst day. Celebrities are posting wonderful things, and kids see it as normal. They think things have to be perfect like it is for the celebrities. Everyone has issues, but you don’t see it on social media.”
Breslin noted that she advised parents that not all stress is bad for youngsters. “It the short term, it can be a good thing. Academically, it can motivate you to complete a project or prepare for a test.”
To address anxiety issues, Hogan recommended to “embrace the new norm.”
“Technology needs to get baptized; kids need to become organized, to learn self-awareness, self-management and social awareness. They need to learn relationship skills,” he said.
“Simple rules won’t work anymore. Begin the day with quiet, calming prayer. Bring [the youngsters] to Jesus. Start the day with gratitude … do things as a family.”