By Mary Stadnyk | Associate Editor

In the eyes of the Catholic Church, the most effective means for catechizing children is if their parents are involved in the process. But it’s often challenging for parents to truly appreciate what that means and what the Church is asking them to do.

The ways in which the Church can assist parents in their role as the primary educators of the faith for their children was a focal point of a diocesan formation day for parish catechetical leaders and catechists hosted by the diocesan Ministry of Catechesis and Evangelization Aug. 22 in St. William the Abbot Parish, Howell.

Leading into his keynote address on “Evangelizing Parents, Engaging Students,” noted author, clinical psychologist and former parish director of faith formation Dr. Joseph White noted how statistics indicate that “we are losing the youth of our Church” and that the main outreach that is provided by the Church to youth is primarily geared toward those who are high school and college-aged.

Sharing that he is of the opinion that the reach out should begin at an earlier age, Dr. White said, “We can learn much from psychological and educational research on how to engage young children and teens, as well as their families, which is key to really making a lasting impact.”

Dr. White admitted that the daily challenges facing families, such as work schedules, maintaining households and other responsibilities can hinder parents from becoming more active in the faith lives of their children. In addition, parents who feel they have not been adequately formed in the Catholic faith may lack the confidence in wanting to share their faith experiences and knowledge with their children.

But there are practical ways in which parishes can help parents become more engaged.

One such example, Dr. White noted, is through the milestones occurring in the lives of families such as baptismal preparation. It’s a time when parish communities can assist parents with their task at being the primary teachers of the faith.

“We see [families] at Baptism and then have nothing more for them until elementary school. Baptismal preparation is a unique evangelization opportunity because research indicates that this is one time when parents are willing to do much more than what we require of them. They want to dive deeper because they know this new child will change many things about their lives and they are ready to do that,” he said. “If we wait until first or even second grade to start getting families involved, they will have already built their lives around other social systems – the families they know from their children’s schools, extra-curricular activities…. Because most parishes have very little for preschool-aged children and their families, they don’t have a close, established relationship with the parish.”

Other “evangelizing moments” might include weddings, the birth of a new child, the death of a family member and other important milestones in the life of a family, he said.

For families with elementary and middle school-aged children, Dr. White recommended that parishes make parent gatherings available while their children attend religious education class. And it’s important that the chosen topics are of interest to the parents, he asserted.

Dr. White suggested that parishes also offer parents plenty of opportunities to get involved in parish life.

Parents, he said, could serve as catechists, catechetical assistants “or in ways that intersect with other ministries in which they might be involved.” Or, perhaps, parents can help to organize family related events such as an All Saints Day Fair, a blessing of pets for the Feast of St. Francis or an Advent party.

Dr. White took time to address questions of specific concern to the audience, such as how to provide effective religious education for children with special needs. He emphasized the importance of integrating special needs students in regular religious education classroom settings if possible.

Denise Contino, director of religious education in St. Benedict Parish, Holmdel, spoke highly of the “fabulous information” that Dr. White gave on how catechetical leaders can stay connected with families. 

“It’s an important topic because if we do not evangelize the families then the children will not be engaged in their parish,” she said.

Dr. Linda Dix, director of religious education in Our Lady of Good Counsel Parish, Moorestown, shared insight that she and her staff gained from the workshop, then noted how Our Lady of Good Counsel Parish holds family-type events, such as the monthly Sunday Masses and breakfasts that follow.

“The parents and children love the events,” she said, noting that some 380 people were expected to attend the September gathering.

“Rather than simply talk about community, we are experiencing the energy of the parish community together as led by our parish priests” – Father Damian McElroy, pastor, and Father Matthew Pfleger, parochial vicar.

“Dr. White emphasized that we understand God better through our relationships as family, and certainly coming together as parish family, we feel the embrace of a loving God and our families are transformed and invigorated by these endeavors,” Dix said.