A Message from Bishop David M. O’Connell, C.M.
Over the years, the Church’s experience of Lent has deepened and matured. While earlier generations often emphasized somewhat exclusively what we “give up,” many today also highlight what we are called to “give.”
The season that begins on Ash Wednesday, once marked by an unmistakably sober tone, has gradually taken on a more inviting character. The Church has never abandoned the penitential heart of Lent, but she now often expresses it in ways that accent the more life-giving and transformative rather than simply things burdensome. Sacrifice remains important – but it is no longer meant to stand alone.
I have long believed in a “both/and” approach rather than an “either/or.” And so, for me, Lent is truly both: a sacred season of penance in which I am called, by the very nature of Lent itself, to give up and to give. These are not competing paths. Together, they lead us toward conversion of heart which is the purpose of Lent.
In my prayer and reflection as Bishop of this Diocese, I am ever mindful of my responsibility to walk with the faithful – clergy, religious, and laity alike – as we seek to live our Christian lives more fully. Lent offers us a special grace-filled opportunity to intensify our pursuit of holiness as we prepare to celebrate the Passion, Death, and Resurrection of the Lord Jesus Christ, the very center of our faith. And so, together – bishop and people, shepherds and flock – let us renew our focus on the call to holiness that lies at the heart of Lent and, indeed, at the heart of our life’s journey.
Each weekend we profess our belief in “one, holy, Catholic, and apostolic Church.” In my first pastoral letter as Bishop, I reflected at length on these four marks, especially the call to holiness. Scripture reminds us: “As he who called you is holy, be holy yourselves in every aspect of your conduct, for it is written, ‘Be holy, because I am holy’” (1 Peter 1:15–16). The season of Lent is one of the Church’s great gifts to help us respond to that call.
Our motivation is clear and compelling:
The Church’s call to holiness is rooted in Christ’s own invitation to be holy in imitation of him. The holiness of the Church is not merely a reflection of but an identification with the very holiness of God. Can the Church be anything less than what God calls her to be in imitation of him (Pastoral Letter, August 28, 2012).
This is why Lent matters so deeply. Giving something up and making sacrifices are meaningful only if they draw us closer to Christ and shape us more fully in his likeness. Without that deeper purpose, even sincere sacrifices risk becoming empty gestures. It is a bit like going on a temporary diet: we may see short-term results, but without lasting change, we soon return to old habits. Lenten sacrifices are meant to lead us beyond themselves – to a deeper communion with Jesus Christ, who loved us and gave himself for us on the Cross.
Each of us, then, must prayerfully ask this Lent: What more can I do for him? What can I give up so that my life may more clearly reflect his love? Lent invites us to say with St. Paul, “I have been crucified with Christ; yet I live, no longer I, but Christ lives in me” (Galatians 2:19–20).
But Lent is also about what we give. And here, too, the goal is holiness in Christ. We give because he first gave to us. We serve because we recognize his face in the faces of others. As Jesus tells us, “Whatever you did for one of these least brothers or sisters of mine, you did for me” (Matthew 25:40).
If I may offer one simple thought that brings together this “both/and” of Lent, it is this: time. Giving up some of our time so that we may give our time – to God and to others – as a path toward holiness.
As a child, time seemed endless. I had plenty of it, and I often wasted it. As we grow older, time feels different. It moves faster. It becomes precious. Perhaps this Lent – whether we are young or old or somewhere in between – we can reflect prayerfully on how we use the gift of time in our pursuit of holiness.
First, give time to God
Slow down. Make space. Spend time with the One who created us, who loves us as we are, who walks with us each day, who promised to be with us always (Matthew 28:20), and who will one day call us home. We somehow find time for many things in our lives. Lent gently asks us: Can we not find time for God?
One concrete way is the Mass. For many Catholics, returning regularly to Sunday Mass may feel difficult or even overwhelming. Less than 17% of baptized Catholics in the Diocese of Trenton go to Mass each weekend. But Lent is a season of new beginnings. The Eucharist is not simply another obligation; it is the place where we are nourished, strengthened, forgiven, and renewed. It is, as the Second Vatican Council teaches, “the source and summit of the Christian life.” Giving an hour to the Lord each week can quietly reshape the rest of our lives. Lent is a beautiful time to reconnect, to come home, and to let God do what only he can do.
Personal prayer is another gift we can reclaim. Prayer need not be complicated. It can begin with a moment of stillness, a word of gratitude, an honest plea for help, or a humble request for forgiveness. Let go of distractions. Speak to God in your own words. Return to the Sacrament of Reconciliation (Confession), even if it has been a long time. There is freedom and peace waiting there. This Lent, give God a little more of your time – and see what he does with it.
Second, give time to others
Everything we are and everything we have bears the fingerprints of others – parents, children, friends, neighbors, coworkers. Love is never abstract. It is expressed in presence, attention, and time.
A phone call or visit to an elderly parent or relative can be a profound act of love. Time spent with our children – listening, guiding, simply being present – can shape their lives in ways we may never fully see. Reaching out to someone who is sick, lonely, or struggling, even briefly, can be a quiet but powerful witness to Christ’s compassion.
Some may feel called to give time in a more structured way: volunteering with the poor, the hungry, the sick, or those with special needs. Not all our time – but some of it. Lent may be the season when that invitation becomes clear.
The Scriptures remind us that there are two great commandments: to love God and to love our neighbor. Jesus makes it even more personal: “Love one another as I have loved you” (John 15:12). Love always costs something. Love always takes time.
This Lent, the question is simple and deeply personal: are we willing to give something up? Are we willing to give something? The season of Lent invites us to answer – not with words alone, but with our lives.