By Jennifer Mauro | Associate Editor
For more than three decades, the WINGS youth group in St. Joan of Arc Parish, Marlton, has been more than a group. It’s been a real family affair.
Just ask the generations of best friends, siblings – and yes, even spouses – who’ve met in the youth group, which is celebrating its 35th year.
“The teens constantly refer to WINGS as their family,” said Jay Keesler, parish youth ministry coordinator.
And he should know. Keesler met his wife, Shawna, in WINGS when they were in high school more than 20 years ago. The couple has three children – ages 4, 16 and 23. Their eldest is a former WINGS member and current adult advisor, and their daughter is a current member. Even the youngest is involved.
“The group calls him their mascot,” Shawna Keesler said with a laugh, explaining that her youngest son has been toted to so many outings, it’s as if he’s growing up with the group. “When he has a birthday, he invites them [youth group]. It’s like they have a little brother.”
The group, which is gearing up for a new year, has around 35 to 40 active members and 21 adult advisors, many of whom are former members or have children of their own in WINGS.
Jay Keesler attributes the group’s longevity and generational membership in part to its history of being a place of acceptance and warmth. “The magic of WINGS is the fact that we have a safe, fun environment for teens to be themselves and de-stress,” he said. “You don’t even have to be a Catholic … as long as you’re respectful of our beliefs.”
Shawna Keesler agreed, saying, “The group has always come together by sharing the same morals.
“They really feel like it’s a second family. They can be themselves and not be judged, and they have a group of adults they trust and look to for support.”
This is exemplified, she said, in the fact that many of the group’s seniors are reluctant to leave the group at the end of the school year.
“We usually let the seniors stay until the end of summer, because it’s hard for them to let go,” she said.
Cherokee High School senior Kimi Kiley can certainly relate. She said she’s going to miss WINGS when she graduates in the spring but hopes to return after she’s finished college.
“I would love to come back one day and be an adult advisor,” she said, adding that being in the group taught her many life skills. “When I started as a freshman, I was really shy and I hated speaking in front of a group. Jay told me, ‘By the time you graduate WINGS, you won’t have a fear of public speaking.’ And I really have gotten over it.”
So much so, Kiley will be one of the senior leaders at the fall campout retreat Nov. 4-6 in Tabernacle. This year’s theme is “Respect,” and Kiley plans to lead a discussion about her past, personal experiences and offer advice on the subject.
“WINGS has made me a better person, socially,” she said, emphasizing that it’s her goal to make new members feel welcome. “Most of my best memories from my high school years are WINGS-oriented. I don’t know what I would have done without it.”
As a matter of fact, WINGS was a blessing that almost wasn’t, Kiley said, explaining that she went to her first meeting as a freshman but didn’t think the group was something she would continue. But after deciding to attend the fall retreat, she returned with a new outlook.
“It was a life-changing experience,” said Kiley, a lector for the parish’s teen Masses. “You’re all together having these heart-to-heart conversations, and it makes you connect to each other in ways you didn’t know you could connect to other people,” she said. “It [WINGS] becomes a safe haven.”
Generations of ‘Family’
Jay Keesler agrees that the fall retreat has always been one of the group’s most energetic and sought-after events of the year.
“Our retreat is our Super Bowl,” he said, echoing Kiley’s sentiments that not only is the retreat a weekend full of faith, fun and friendship in an emotionally safe environment, it also “is one of those things that changes people’s lives.”
Cherokee High School junior Sean Tencer agreed, saying, “It’s an experience that pushes you to connect to other people, and those other people are being urged to connect with you. It’s more than just a fun time. It’s loving and compassionate and helps others feel better about themselves.”
Life-changing is one way Cherokee High School senior Kailey Gaffney describes WINGS, too. Up until the eighth grade, her involvement with the parish centered around Mass on Sundays and holidays. Interested in acting, she decided to try out for the youth group’s passion play. She was awarded a part, which was the catalyst for her involvement in WINGS.
“Ever since I started WINGS, I’ve been participating in more parish events, Masses and doing service projects,” she said. “They [members and leaders] know how to bring people together and bring out the best in everyone,” she said.
Tencer said that’s important, especially during a teen’s formative years. “Because we’re still teenagers, we’re still developing,” he said. “In WINGS, we’re growing and shaping ourselves around each other.”
Like Kiley, Gaffney admits to being shy and introverted when she started with the group. Also like Kiley, she’s now part of the group of teens who helps organize WINGS events. In addition, Gaffney is a leader in a community nonprofit that helps young girls build self-esteem and develop leadership skills.
“I have WINGS to thank for me being who I am today,” she said.
Though she will be graduating in the spring, she’s encouraging her younger brother, who’s in the group, as well as cousins when they come of age to continue with the group.
“I’m hoping the younger generations of Gaffneys stay in as long as possible,” she said.