By David Karas, Correspondent
Top photo caption: Magnific image
Couples considering making the transition from dating to engagement are invited to participate in a virtual coaching session to support their discernment as they take steps toward a healthy, faith-filled marriage.
A series of standalone sessions about this unique courtship phase will be offered through Integrated Hearts Counseling, a Catholic therapy practice in the Diocese of Trenton, and will be led by Cristina D’Averso-Collins, director of the Office of Family Life for the Diocese of Metuchen.
“By the time of engagement, there are so many worldly preoccupations that prevent it from being a true period of discernment,” D’Averso-Collins said. “It seems that couples must have certain substantive discussions about Catholic marriage while dating.”
D’Averso-Collins said she has recognized “a great need for earlier and more intentional marriage preparation” over the course of a decade of prior experience as a college campus minister and in her current role in Metuchen.
She has also noticed the distractions that can sometimes interfere with true discernment and preparation. “Engagement is supposed to be a time for intentional discernment, but this is often lost due to the financial burdens of booking venues (and paying) deposits, as well as the overwhelming prevalence of cohabitation, which obliterates any clear vision with which to discern,” she said.
With her husband, Brian, D’Averso-Collins also works with couples in their home parish of St. Michael, West End.
In each session, couples will be guided through the process of crafting vision statements and assessing both personal and shared values, all with the aim of creating reasonable relationship goals.
“Alignment with the Catholic vision of marriage will also be discussed,” she added. “After each exercise, couples will have the opportunity to share insights, if they feel comfortable doing so.”
D’Averso-Collins encourages couples pondering engagement to consider participating in a session, even if they are earlier along in the dating stages.
“If engagement has even remotely crossed your mind, please consider it,” she said. “Give yourself the opportunity in a low-stakes environment to intentionally discern whether this is the person you are called to marry.”
Identical, virtual coaching sessions will be held on Sept. 26, Nov. 21 and Jan. 16 – all Saturdays, from 10 a.m. to 1 p.m. Registration is $150 per couple, and those seeking to register or learn more can visit www.ihccnj.com/group or contact Chris Maher at chris@ihccnj.com.